Pirouette Through Your Problems

Happy National Dance Day!

This video is in celebration of this fun day, and in honor of The Bald Ballerina and her Turning Challenge! (more on that below)

As you hopefully know about me by now, I love to dance! I love the freedom, the expression, the technique, the difficulty, the variety, the creativity, all of it!

Over the last month, I've been taking summer classes up at BYU, including a 2 hours a day, 5 days a week ballet class. I love it! But my knee didn't so much (you might have noticed the brace in the picture/video). Nothing major is wrong, but lately it's been a bit harder to enjoy what I love.

But the minor injury I have now and others I have had in the past are nothing compared to what Maggie Kudirka has gone through. Breast cancer put her career as a ballerina with the Joffery Concert Group in New York City on hold when she was diagnosed at age 23. (Please donate to her cause! Follow this link and click on Donate!)

But I'm not here for a sob story or a pity party.

I'm here because I want to celebrate.

I want to celebrate my miraculous body which can not only do all kinds of things within the art of dance, but can heal itself when things do go wrong. I want to celebrate strong women like Maggie who are fighting all kinds of fights all over the world every day. I want to celebrate the things we love to do and the people we want to become.

Things are going to happen that you don't expect or want.

You might feel discouraged or frustrated sometimes.

And that's okay.

Maybe you're dancing through life, enjoying the music, feeling beautiful and strong. And then, a slippery spot on the stage you didn't see coming sends you tumbling (quite ungracefully) to the floor.

You now have two choices:

Lie there, feeling sorry for yourself

OR

Get back up and keep dancing.

Everything is a choice. 

Don't let anything stop you from doing what you love or becoming the person you want to be.

You can find joy even at the very heart of your problems.

For example:

There are so many people who are struggling just like you who are finding ways to be happy and strong despite the problems you are facing.

Don't stay down, even if the hit you took was a whopper.

Find joy in everything, even that slippery spot that knocked you down.

Get back up.

Don't you quit.

Pirouette through your problems, and dance through life!

Lavenders Blue - Have Courage and Be Kind Revisited

As you may recall from my first post of the year, I am doing my best to have courage and be kind, a la Cinderella. Well a few nights ago, BYU put on a big outdoor showing of Cinderella, and of course I loved it just as much as I have every time I've seen it before.

And it got me thinking more about courage and kindness. And also this dress. Because seriously. look at it. Oh my gosh, I want to wear it so bad and twirl in it and dance forever.

Okay but in more seriousness, I want you to notice the look on her face. Notice the wonder, the excitement, the anticipation. You know that feeling, when you can feel your breath caught somewhere between your beating heart and your sparkling eyes? When you have something wonderful and exciting right in front of you and you can practically taste it?

Why don't you feel like that right now?

Maybe you'd argue that your life is really ordinary, that every day is basically the same, that there's nothing extraordinary going on right now.

Well why not?

Who do you think is in charge of how extraordinary your life is?

I love the Lavenders Blue song from Cinderella. I've been caught singing it doing laundry, in my car, while doing dishes, and just about everywhere else. I especially love that, after stating confidently that she will be Queen and have her King beside her, she asks "Who told me so, dilly dilly, who told me so?"

The answer:

Having a wonderful future is your choice. All you have to do is have the courage and confidence to believe in yourself, and to do what it takes to reach it.

Cinderella had help, to be sure (and nothing wrong with that! - see here), but she still put herself out there. She still believed in herself and was confident enough to go out there and get what she wanted. And what's more, she did it while being her lovely kind self.

The world often portrays women who go after what they want as fierce, unapologetic, and willing to do what it takes to get where they want to go, including stepping on others.

Kindness, especially in the face of unkindness, shows true strength.

Cinderella was brave. She spoke her mind to a handsome stranger she just met, managing to change his perspective forever. She went to the ball, determined to see Kit again, and she remained true to herself even after she found out he was a prince. She stood up to her stepmother's plan, not caring what happened to herself, but willing to sacrifice in order to keep Kit and the kingdom safe.

Cinderella was kind. She befriended those who others deemed unworthy of attention. She shared what little she had. She helped her stepmother and stepsisters with whatever they asked of her, and she even forgave them for their cruelty.

Who was it that told Cinderella she was capable of all this?

It definitely wasn't her stepmother or stepsisters.

Cinderella chose for herself the life she was going to have, against all odds and against all the circumstances that were preventing it.

So make your own choice. 

Choose to use courage and kindness to create the life you want, the life you deserve. 

Who knows? You might just get a prince out of it. ;)

(If someone gets me this dress I will love you until I die and probably after that as well)

Help

I can do it.

Inspiring words? Sure. Correct words? Not completely.

As much as I want to inspire you and make you believe you can do anything (which is true!), I also want to emphasize another point:

I think this about perfectly sums up the problem so many of us who value independence and self-sustainability face: putting too much on your plate. It's great to try and accomplish many different things. It's great to push yourself right up to your limits and sometimes a little farther. 

But sometimes it's better to acknowledge and accept your limitations for what they are.

Sometimes you simply can't do it on your own.

And that's okay.

Our culture seems to have this aversion to admitting we need help, which when you think about it is completely ridiculous because literally everyone needs help with something at some point. No one wants to walk up to someone and say those three little words: "I need help." But why? Are we so prideful that we diligently avoid any action that proves we're imperfect? And why's that?  Are we afraid people will think less of us? Aren't we all imperfect, though? Don't we all need help?

Needing help is nothing to be ashamed about.

Some might think that super confident people don't need to ask for help. That they can handle it by themselves or can figure it out on their own.

I argue that the most confident people are those who openly accept their shortcomings and are willing to ask for the help needed to overcome that which would otherwise be impossible.

Doing the impossible sounds pretty great, huh? Well if you never have the courage to ask for help, you're never going to get past the obstacles in your way. You're never going to reach your full potential unless you learn to rely on the support, advice, and assistance of those around you.

So maybe you can do it.

But maybe you can do it better with a little help.

Instant Confidence

Okay, so I don't have some kind of powder you dissolve in water and POOF! Instant Confidence!

But I do have some things that work just as well.

Sometimes it's the smallest things that can make the biggest difference.

You know when you wear your favorite shirt, and suddenly the world seems like a slightly better place? Or when you play that song you love as you're getting ready and you feel better about how you look by the end?

Everyone has got a little something to make them feel a bit more bold, a bit more brave, or a bit more ready to take on the world.

Everyone's magic confidence toolbox is different, but here are the top three things I pull out of mine.

1. Red Lipstick

Maybe it's the dance team girl in me, but something about red lipstick gives me an instant attitude adjustment. I feel stronger, bolder, a little braver. Sure, it's just makeup, but I think by making that little change on the outside, I automatically make a corresponding change on the inside. If I'm going to have boldly colored lips, then I'd better have a boldly colored spirit to match.

2. High Heels

Ah, my favorite weakness to my bank account. If the heels are tall, colorful, sparkly, unique, and/or involve a bow somewhere, I probably want them. I think having a little something fun on my feet gives me a spring in my step. And there's something about your posture that happens when you wear heels. I feel like I can march into a room and own it. Those few extra inches help me grow a mile.

3. Dancing

There is something about doing what you love that puts you in a place that's so much better than the one you were in before. Even if I mess up, even when I'm a sweaty, red-faced, muscle-hurting mess, dance makes me feel good. It helps me remember to celebrate what my body is capable of instead of bashing on things I might not like about it. Dance is a place for improvement, for becoming better, and for being strong and confident in how far I've come already.

Those are my top three instant confidence boosters. 

Now find yours! 

You never know how much your day can improve with just one simple step towards claiming the confidence you deserve.

So put on that dress. Curl your hair. Play that song. Read that inspiring quote.

Open up your toolbox.